As for further past concert stuff, this installment of To All the Concerts I Loved Before is going to read a bit like a Lilith Fair roster, but that was how things played out. This is interesting, as I had recently kicked my evil second ex-girlfriend out of my life forever so that she could pursue her interests of not working, taking crystal, getting drunk and finding a rich, Slash look-alike boyfriend. The last concert I went to with her was the Tori Amos concert from the last installment. After the bitch was gone, I then attended a string of women singer-songwriter concerts with various women who I was enamored with at that time. So, in addition to judging myself on the merits of the concerts I attended, let's also think of today's entry as a cultural anthropological study of my decimated skills with the ladies during that time period; thanks a lot evil ex-girlfriend, "You Oughta Know" better.
Alanis Morissette at the Arlington Theatre, November 14, 1995 - Yet another concert that I did not want to attend, but was coerced by pressure from my peers, which was odd because that tactic never ever worked on me before. I went with a group of coworkers from the now vanquished evil music store corporation (downtown branch) and the main impetus for my actually spending the money and going was that I had a wicked crush on one of said coworkers. It was at this concert that true love sprang from the...the...ALRIGHT. Nothing happened. Nothing came of it. But...I have to admit that Alanis
put on a great show and the music was much more rocking and far heavier than what was released on her album; I was impressed. Everyone left the concert and as far as my crush was concerned, I had firmly cemented myself into the cold stony facade of friendship forever. *note-Sorry Alanis...I am afraid I will take the fifth on whether or not anyone "went down on me in the theater." I'm sure you can connect the dots, though.Ani Difranco at the Ventura Theatre, May 31, 1996 - This show was in support for the amazing Dilate
album and I attended this particular concert with...excuse me while I puff up my chest and pat myself on the back...the girl at the clothing store who I had crushed on for over a year. This crush was pretty bad, but hey, she was talking with me, hanging out with me, going to movies and dinners with me, I had it made right? Nope. I willingly fastened the chain to my ankle, connected it to the end of a 100-lb rock and tossed the payload into the dark viscous lake of "just friends." Regardless, this show absolutely blew me away. Here was this five-foot tall (is she even that?) woman with elevating boots, playing her guitar in a manner that made no sense to me what-so-ever. All of her fingers were taped and she consistently hammered the shit out of her poor guitar strings to force out the most beautiful of sounds that were only surpassed by her powerfully gorgeous voice. I'm still getting goosebumps thinking about it. Ani Difranco left me with such a rush that I momentarily forgot about the anguish of my crush and went home smiling all the way.Tori Amos at the Santa Barbara County Bowl, June 23, 1996 - Tori Amos warranted a repeat viewing, only this time with much better company. Where as the first concert was with the evil second ex-girlfriend, this one was with the same woman I went to the Ani Difranco concert with, only this concert ended with us...yeah, me getting dropped off with an added level of weirdness--back to that later. My friend, let's call her what she was, somehow got tickets for the third row, which is insane and she invited me to go to the show in support of the Boys for Pele
tour, and I agreed for a multitude of reasons. Great show of course, and--as I later found out--Tori actually pointed out a friend of mine who was seated not too far away from us to say that she liked his hair or something along those lines. Good show, but unfortunately working for the evil music store corporation had began to burn down the candle of tolerance in regard to my enjoyment of the musician by incessantly requiring we play the album. After the show, the crush pulled over to drop me off, and what I thought was to be our first kiss, ended up with her crying in my arms telling me how her new boyfriend was going to jail for violating parole for heroin possession. "Wait, what? Seriously? I thought that...I'm sorry. Wow that sucks. There, there. Um...don't worry about a thing. Uh...every little thing's going to be all right?" Seriously, heroin? Why get involved with someone doing that? He was also shorter, heavier and involved in all sorts of illegal schemes, oh yeah and a heroin addict! He did dress better than me and did not have bad long hair, so I will give the guy that. That's it for this installment. Kinda weird how the theme went from To All the Concerts I Loved Before to To All the Girls I Loved Before, but there you have it. The next entry in the series will continue on with even more of the same: women singer-songwriter shows, the crush, the new woman and better yet the woman who becomes my wife. Funny.
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